Attack of the Toilet

Okay, this one is weird, even for us.  I will tell you that it is wonderful having a medical family.  We been saved from multiple trips to the emergency room for minor injuries and stitches as long as "Doc" is available.  There was the time when "The Blonde" stood up under the corner of a beam and split her head open.  We couldn't locate "doc" and I took her to the emergency room.  Not long after we arrived, I got a call from "Doc" with instructions to leave the emergency room and meet him at the office.  anyway, this whole story came out of a conversation as I was having my shoulder injected at the kitchen table.

All of the kids were very involved in sports.  The boys played football, basketball, baseball, and ran track.  The girls were runners and basketball players.  The whole family was always there to support whoever was participating at the time.  I swore the youngest kids were shaped like carseats for years because we traveled everywhere to watch the older siblings in sporting events. Every spring there was a major track meet about an hour from home.  It was in the evening and we always got home late.  I cannot remember who was running at the time, I think it may have been "Mommy"  Everybody went, even my brother which was unusual.  When we left, we decided to order pizza and chill out at our house after.  We got home and the smallest bladders ran to the bathroom immediately.

Now before I finish this story, let me ask you to think about something.  Have you ever had the handle to your toilet stick so that it doesn't flush or the toilet continues to run water?  If that happened in your house, would your child fix it?  I would bet the answer is no.  These are people who will step over dirty clothes and won't put them in the laundry! I would tell you that my kids would pretend just not flush.

I am wrong.  "Pook" ran to the half bath near "Calvin's" room as soon as we got home.  I was barely in the house when I heard a loud crash.  The next thing I heard was "Pook"  screaming "I'm sorry!" I don't know why but my first thought was that he broke the fish tank in "Calvin's" room and there is water and fish everywhere!  With this mob, I have been trained to expect the craziest things that could happen.  I came around the corner, and "Pook" was running at me with blood pouring down his leg.  Apparently, he decided to fix the toilet and dropped the lid to the tank.  He found out just how sharp pieces of ceramic are.  It sliced his shin wide open.  I scooped this middle school child into my arms and headed back to the garage, catching "Doc" on his way in the door.

Now here is the funny part.  We started to head to the office for stitches.  I am a nurse.  I don't do stitches.  I get sick!  On the way down the driveway, we picked up my sister in law.  She is also a nurse, and she does stitches.  "Doc" gets all the supplies ready, and we have "Pook" on an exam table.  He wants to see what they are doing, I am trying to stop him because it will make me sick. "Doc" puts a stitch in and asks my sister in law to cut the suture line.  Um, she couldn't see it.  In all the haste, she forgot her glasses which are as thick as coke bottle bottoms!  So she took "Doc's" glasses off his face put them on hers, snipped the stitch and put them back on his face for the next stitch.  And so it went until the wound was closed.  The really disappointing part was that the pizza was cold when we got home. 

You can't make this stuff up and you don't need to embellish it to make a reality show out of it.  Such is our life.