Willard Returns!

When I was little, the original movie "Willard" was made. I distinctly remember seeing it at the theater.  If you saw it today you would laugh at the bad dialogue and substandard filming in comparison to today's standards.  Back then, as a nine or ten year old, it was horrifying and that movie has impacted me for the rest of my life.  Okay, I am terrified of mice.  I don't want to hear that they are harmless.  They are little vermin that carry diseases.  Remember the black plague?  And according to my knowledge of them based on "Willard", they are capable of sophisticated conspiracy against humans.  And furthermore, I knew Michael Jackson was a problem.  Who writes a song and sings to a rat named "Ben"?

I could never ask my girls for help in dealing with these critters.  I would never want them traumatized like I have been.  However, "The Ninja" and my boys have rescued me on multiple occasions.  We live in farm country.  No one told me before we moved here that I would have to deal with mice.  It wasn't long after we moved into the "Haney Place" that I realized that this was a problem to be reckoned with.  It is an old farm house.  It has mice.  EEK!  I remember calling "The Ninja" one afternoon because I opened a drawer on the stove and found a dead one.  I stood on a chair while on the phone screaming.  God was kind when he sent her friendship to me.  My best friend arrived to find me still on a chair and asked me where I saw it. I told her about the drawer and she opened it ever so carefully and then looked at me and said "It's dead."  Oh yeah, did I forget to mention that?

It wasn't long after that, "Mommy" decided to ask for a hamster.  I was a little distraught, I admit.  Hamsters are in the same genre as mice, right?  But I said yes, against my better judgement.  To my horror, it kept escaping.  I am ashamed to admit that I was glad when he went to rodent heaven.  Not long after that, "Calvin" came into the house all excited and hollered "Look mommy, I found a nest of baby hamsters outside!"  EEK!  What he found was a nest of mice.  I was sure I would never survive out here in the wilderness!

When we built our house, I thought my problems were over.  New house, no mice.  Wrong!  They continued to plague me.  We live in farm country.  I am an intelligent woman.  I should be able to comprehend this.  Those little rascals are everywhere.  I can't keep cats, because the dogs think they are chew toys.  So again, God was kind when he also gave me boys. 

There was that day, when I got out an already opened bag of potting soil and poured it into a basin to start planting flower pots.  I ruined some mother mouse's day because I discovered her home complete with babies.  I shrieked at the top of my lungs for an extended period of time, causing every male within a half mile radius to come running.  When they were done laughing and disposing of the nest, they finally told me that there was a mouse clinging to the house near where I had run to.  Wait, mice can climb.  Is there nowhere safe?!!!

A few days ago, the boys came running as I shrieked about the dead mouse that was upside down on a glue trap in the yard.  Yesterday, there were several encounters as "The Surprise" and I cleaned out the attic.  All dead, but terrifying nonetheless.  apparently "Doc" had forgotten about two bags of bird food that were in the garage.  These guys have had a veritable feast going all winter.  The cleanup is complete, but I think I need tranquilizers and possibly a higher dose of blood pressure medication. I know those little monsters are plotting their next attack.  If you doubt me, watch "Willard".